Nothing makes more excited than The Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion. These ebony queens come equipped with excellent fashions and an excessive amount of shade to throw. No one does a reunion better than an Atlanta Housewife. This year the theme is Spain, to honour their trip to Barcelona, and the peaches don't disappoint in there bright colours and sexy floor length dresses. The women decided to go natural with their hair, well as natural as they can go - but at least there's no platinum blonde wigs floating around. Of course they all can't be winners and many of them aren't, but that's why I'm going to break their looks down and provide you with all the shade you need!
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9. Sheree Whitfield
Nope. What the fuck was Sheree thinking? Tyrone must have picked this out from behind bars because Miss Wigfield looks a damn mess. She looks like a fuchsia bag of potatoes tied together with a cheap Gucci belt. Sheree is known for her great body and muscle arms, so I don't know why she wouldn't want to show it all off. I don't mind her long pony and sexy emerald earrings but I just can't get past her ugly dress that covers every inch of her body. It's the reunion, at least give us a little cleavage! The only place this dress would be suitable to wear is in you're grandma's closet or in a coffin, but there is no place for it at a reunion.
8. Kim Zolciak
Kim and her newest face look lost in this covering red dress. Her hair and make up are already tried and now she's running around in a morph suit?! This look is the definition of basic. The resident white girl of the group looks like a used cherry flavoured condom, because that thing is tight and not right. I really have anything to say about this flat look, there's nothing there to critique! She could have at least bombed like Sheree so then I could have thrown some premium shade at her cheap Khloe Kardashian wannabe ass. Ugh, I'll just be happy when I don't have to look at her tupperware face on my screen anymore, because we've heard the word on the street and it is not good for Kim and wig!
7. Eva Marcille
Kim and Sheree's looks were bad, but this look is just boring. It's Eva's first reunion and you're telling me THIS is the dress and hair she chose?! Bitch looks like she got her dress from the summer collection at Forever 21 and that is not a compliment unless your goal is to be a basic bitch, like Kim and Brielle! Could she not have found a good wig to sit on her head because she looks like she just got out the shower. It's not that I don't like this look because it would be perfect for a wedding but not a Housewives reunion, especially Atlanta, this shit may fly in Beverly Hills but not in the ATL. Better luck next year Eva, if you make it!
6. NeNe Leakes
NeNe is a fashionista and nailed this Spain theme. but it's not my favourite look of the group. She looks like one of those red flags that they wave at the bulls, is this is signal to Kim and Sheree? The Queen Bee's hair is on point and I love her with a long blonde wig on. She looks natural and beautiful but I just wish that she wouldn't have covered her boobs because she has a nice pair of titties that we know she loves to show off. I have to say, this dress looks better in action and this blurry photo that Bravo provided us with does not do it any justice. I don't have anything bad to say but NeNe got beat on her fashion game at this reunion.
5. Marlo Hampton
Come through Miss Hampton! Marlo is looking like a lavender loofah and it oddly suits her. If this cotton candy outfit was on anyone else I would shade them for days, but it just works for Marlo and her gold digging ways. The hair is snatched and is probably the one thing that the reunion that will be longer that Kim's lies. The pink pumps are a bit random but this is fashionista Marlo we are talking about, she knows what she's doing. Does she look like a drunk prom queen at Disneyland? Yes. Am I weirdly obsessed with this look? Yes. Marlo should have worn something sexy and skin tight to this reunion to show off her body and give all the haters their life but this fluffy outfit will do! Hopefully she's back next year to serve some more lewks!
4. Cynthia Bailey
50 Cynt looks like a pageant horse in her flowing red dress. The red colour suits the Spain theme and her long pony is giving me all the life that I need. She does look like a tampon on the first day of someone's period, but Miss Bailey is proudly 51, so she probably doesn't have to worry about those menstrual problems anymore. No tea, No shade. Cynthia is beat for the gods but maybe a wig with some extra volume would go with this sexy look because this dress is a lot and I needed her hair to be even more. Cynthia IS KNOWN for her hair hunni. However THIS is definitely want we want to see when we tune into a Housewives reunion. Good for you 50 Cynt, well 51 Cynt.
3. Porsha Williams
Are we supposed to believe that Porsha is the queen now after she had no friends or storyline for this whole season? Okay. Her crown looks like she got it from a cheap party store, which isn't a bad thing because we know she's a frugal bitch. I'm not sure how this meets the Spain theme but she is serving Game Of Throne realness like Erika Jayne's confessional this season. If the purple velvet dress isn't enough, her cleavage gives the outfit some extra power with those two perky sacks of fat hanging out for the world to see. AND that hair is on point. Who doesn't love a hoe that wears that horse hair well? This outfit is everything that it needed to be and Miss P looks like she is ready to hold court and slay some bitches all the live long day!
2. Kandi Burruss
Kandi looks like a black barbie in this gold dress. Seriously Miss Burruss is channeling an Oscar in this STUNNING beaded look. Her top pony looks incredible and is everything that it needs to be. I literally can't find one fault about this look and I can't think of anything bitchy to say about it, I love it. It's sexy, slutty, fancy, bougie and a little bit cheap all at the same time, which are basically the requirements to have a stunning reunion look. The Grammy award winner always manages to be quietly brilliant but she needs to get credit where credit is due, because she stealing focus from everyone on her coach with her look. I don't enough nice things to say about her in this dress! SLAY BLACK BARBIE, SLAY!
1. Kenya Moore
Yes Miss Twirl is my number one pick. First things first, Kenya's feet are not ashy at all which a new thing for her. As long as those feet aren't ashy she automatically gets extra points because it must be work to lotion up those puppies. This yellow coloured look is everything but looks so much better standing up because this photo does not do it justice. Mrs Moore-Daly looks like a Spanish prom queen crossed between a lemon flavoured cough drop with this look and is slaying for days. I love the low-key blonde tips in her hair because they match her skin tone perfectly. From the dress, to the no ash, to the hair and jewellery, Kenya DID THAT and all to save her job on the show because if she didn't deliver at this reunion she was going to be check-less over at Moore Manor. Congratulations Kenya, you won this reunion!
The Real Housewives of Atlanta airs Sunday at 8/7c on Bravo! Stay tuned at Good Tea for our shady recaps and exclusive tea on our favourite Georgia peaches.