I'm over Beverly Hills. The show is dead in my opinion. I know it is only the second episode back but I'm bored and I don't have high hopes for this season. No one is willing to get their hands dirty and participate in the drama so we are forced to watch this franchise float by using their extravagant lifestyles. Fuck the lifestyles. I'd rather watch women with a lower socioeconomic status fight about a dinner party than watch these women brag about their latest birkin bag. I'm over it! But alas, I have to do my job and report to you the weekly goings on with these spoilt rich bitches so here it goes!
The girls are still in Vegas. Rinna arrived and delivered her awkward hellos and spoke in her nice syllable sentences "Hell-O Dor-It". Dorito acted weird and kept taking cheap shots at Rinna, LVP style. Ugh. Adrienne Maloof turned up in her Maloof Hoofs and is starting to look like Mama Elsa. She really needs to put the botox down because it's not a good look. The girls went out to dinner and got to know newbie Teddi more. Her dad is John Mellencamp and all the girls pretended that they are massive fans. She is also an accountability coach and keeps people accountable for stuff? She could have just said that she is a personal trainer but okay. Teddi also used to be REALLY fat and look like a chubby Kate Gosselin in her throwback photos.
The ladies then went over to the nightclub and danced like they were in RHOBH season one. Camille knows how to slay. The cancer girl's photos were projected onto the screen and everybody went to bed happy. Is this even a reality show because everybody is getting along. BORING!
The next morning Erika, Dorito and Teddi all played poker at 10am in the morning. Erika and Dorito were acting like best friends which was literally exhausting to watch. The new "friends" bragged about how much money they were gambling away while newbie Teddi sat in the corner and walked away with her $800 win. I actually think that Teddi is a REALLY good addition. This whole season is going to be about their lifestyles and she isn't a rich, spoilt bitch like the other women. She doesn't care about labels or money which will be interesting to see how she gets along with Erika and Dorito because that is ALL they care about.
Lisa Vanderpump rocked up and said she's happy that everybody is friends but then brought up how she doesn't think she and Erika are real friends. Of course they aren't. Erika has known that LVP is a snake from day one and has obviously been keeping her distance. They all went shopping and bragged about their money. Again.
Teddi went to meet Kyle, Rinna and Camille at the pool where literally nothing happened. Kyle talked about her upcoming European trip while Rinna ran around in a string bikini. Lips knows how to HUSTLE and OWN IT in that little bikini. Everybody is still getting along. It's like the twilight zone or something.
All the girls got changed again because if they are in the same outfits for more than 20 minutes they will die. They all boarded onto the High Roller ferris wheel and Kyle was freaking out until she found the bar. I'm also getting sick of the ladies joking about how much alcohol they drink. We all know these girls hardly drink and are obviously in bed at 9pm every night. I miss Brandi. Dorito decided to confront Rinna about the coke comment last season. Rinna clapped back that PK had called her so many names and Dorito denied that, even though they were supported by a string of flashbacks. Ugh. The girls decided to like each other and Lisa Rinna realised that she can't go around saying crazy things on camera for dramatic effect. Now this is going to be a boring season.
Kyle also confronted Rinna about her hike with Harry Hamlin but Lisa already knew and said that Harry shouldn't have said anything. That was it. VERY anti climatic. So far I haven't liked a single frame of this episode. Except Rinna's confessionals because she is slaying all day long.
After the ferris wheel they girls all got drinks together and Kyle left to go pack for her upcoming Croatia trip. Erika played with an ice stick in her drink and called it an ice dildo which the girls all weirdly played with. Ew. Maybe the Ice Queen can have fun with her own ice stick. Dorito asked about Teddi's dad again, and she said that he was super normal to grow up with and asked Erika about her dad who she never knew until she was 25. Yet another piece to the Erika Jayne puzzle. I thought that her daddy issues must have been the reason that she married an old man but she said that her dad is much younger than her husband. HA!
After the conversation there was a weird, kinda bitchy moment between Erika and Teddi so they obviously aren't going to be friends. I just think that Erika can't be bothered to get to know another new girl. She is definitely developing that NeNe Leakes persona.
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Tuesday at 9/8c on Bravo! Stay tuned at Good Tea for our shady recaps and exclusive tea on these 90210 ladies.